I had narrowed my life to two major things: building a successful career and planning for my legacy. With these two, I felt like my life was well balanced until I met one whose work-life balance struck me – then it dawned on me how narrow I had created my life to be. Because of this, I had to face my past and heal from there. She had opened my eyes.
She had opened my eyes to the beautiful life I had forgotten – I had for a while overlooked the essence of human relationships, and because I wanted to feel alive among people once more, I dared to face my dark past where I had learned to be socially cold and indifferent. But you see, you can’t live in hiding for long. Time to face the dark past moments had come.
For instance, the betrayal of trust by some people, hurt from past failed relationships and toxic comments from people had been insignificant to me, until I realized that each sad episode had successively pushed me to narrowing my social experiences – presumably to avoid pain. That’s a possible explanation of how I had become indifferent especially when it came to being social.
I decided to face my dark past so that I don’t bleed past wounds on new people in my life. I contacted some of the people that had hurt me before, and people that had afflicted me in ways that forced me to narrow my degree of trust and openness with people. I simply explained the pain they had caused me, and how it had affected me. Some thanked me for being open to them about how they had affected me, and it was comforting to hear someone that once hurt you say sorry.
Am happy to say that with healing, am more willing to get out of my safe space and experience real connection with people again. I am now out to make the most of this gift of life.
The moral of this article is: don’t underestimate the impact you have on other people, and the impact that others have on you. What people say and do may look insignificant. It however affects you in many small ways. You can lead your life to reach your goals; you can live deliberately.